Melbourne’s cabaret club scene is going on tour through the streets of Clarinda, hosted by bogan bombshell Janeen, “with two n’s and two e’s”.
Janeen bursts onto the stage in her imitation leathers, fascinator and of course her pink rubber cleaning gloves. Her dilemma – she needs $176 to bail out the love of her life and Preston McDonald’s CEO, Johnno from prison.
In attempt to raise a buck or two to help her man, Janeen does a stint of burlesque dancing under her pseudonym Boom Boom Bogan Bombshell. Bumping and grinding across the stage Janeen was blessed with less rhythm than a surfboard. Despite rating herself great in the art of tease her career fails miserably due to her in ability to “get her kit off”.
Being a classy working girl Janeen has other avenues of income. She is dedicated to a life of sanitation, cleaning the dunnies of mansions in Torak and filthy nightclubs. ‘Bam’ – the product of choice for sanitizing the sewerage.
McCann incorporates classic songs, like Dolly Parton’s Jolene and Byran Adam’s Summer of 69 into her self-written performance, giving the audience some hilarious, cringe-worthy new lyrics that are guaranteed to be any English teachers worst nightmare.
The self-confessed chocolate addict dedicates an entire slideshow to all the Cadbury favourites close to her heart. Mint Aero her obvious choice, as it gives her “the strength to carry on”.
In her final attempt to earn some quick cash Janeen takes on a job as phone sex operator. Telling tales of the interesting list of customers she receives: the bondage caller, the creepy caller and of course the quickie caller. Their bizarre infatuation with Janeen’s less than seductive voice keeps them coming back for more.
This tale of Janeen and her beloved hometown of Clarinda is the definition of straya. Her favourite phrase “youse are gonna love it”, compliments the entire performance of her life in zone 2.
Played by Susie McCann the award-winning show is 60 minutes of true Aussie humour.
For ticket information visit www.susiemccann.com/upcominggigs
Tour dates
| When: Friday 20 November @ 8:30pm Venue: Ruby’s Music Room, 132 Lt Lonsdale St, City Tickets: $25 Full / $20 Conc & Groups 6+ |
When: Wednesday 2 December @ 7pm Venue: The Butterfly Club, Carson Place, City Tickets: $32 |
