7 golden moments of AFL broadcasting

On the back of the AFL announcing the biggest TV rights deal with the Seven Network and Fox Sports in the sport’s history, The City Journal decided to remember the commentators who have made coverage of the game great.

Dennis Cometti – ‘Rocca, like my wife driving, needs a fair bit of lane’

Cometti is a stalwart of sports commentary in Australia, having called his first football match in 1971 and his first cricket test in 1973. There have been numerous instances when Cometti’s dulcet tones have made viewers sit up and re-think what they thought they heard – among those is the 2007 semi-final between West Coast and Collingwood in Perth. A kick to the Magpies’ forward 50 would have been the perfect opportunity for another long goal by Collingwood veteran Anthony Rocca, who was outplayed by an Eagles defender. Cometti brought a simple defensive play to life by comparing Rocca, weighing 104kg throughout his career, to the driving of his wife, Velia. No word on what she thought of the comment.

Dennis Cometti at his finest

Dennis showing everyone just why he’s the greatest ever football caller in history.

2. Eddie McGuire – ‘You old c-nt’

Eddie McGuire has spoken a lot of words in his life – most of them seemingly on air. The comment wasn’t during a broadcast of an AFL match – instead he made it during his round-in-review show with Dermott Brereton, creatively titled Ed and Derm’s Big Week in Footy. Immaculately dressed for the 2014 Logies, for which he presented an award, McGuire suggested then-31-year-old Port Adelaide player Kane Cornes needed two rub-downs after the match because of his advanced age. McGuire might have been on to something, given that “players near and beyond the age of 30 are seen as past their prime”, but he could have chosen his words more carefully, a recurring theme in recent years for McGuire.

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3. Gerard Healy – ‘Gold c-nts’

Healy, another seasoned commentator since starting with Seven in the ’90s, also decided to throw the switch to profanity. Previewing a match between Melbourne and the Gold Coast Suns with Anthony Hudson and Danny Frawley, Healy combined the words “Coast” and “Suns”, making Hudson double over in surprise while Frawley was able to keep a straight face.

Gerard Healy says Gold Cunts

One of the more awkward moments on live TV. Gerard drops the c bomb live before Melbourne Gold Coast on May 12th 2013

4. Bruce McAvaney – ‘Delicious’

The City Journal was not able to find any original videos of the comment, however, a clip from Nine’s The Footy Show clearly demonstrates McAvaney’s use of the word in relation to Hawthorn player Cyril Rioli. It will be a long time – maybe when Seven’s right to broadcast AFL matches ends in 2022 – before people forget about this remark.

Cyril Rioli is Delicious

Bruce Mcavaney describes Cyril Rioli as a delicious young player.

5. Bruce McAvaney – Tiger roar

The “special” show continues with McAvaney deciding to roar like a tiger after Richmond player Matt White kicked a goal against Port Adelaide in round 22, 2010. There was no indication McAvaney would actually roar, which is followed by the (nervous) chuckles of McAvaney’s fellow callers. David Schwarz gets on with the job of filling the awkward silence.

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6. Kelli Underwood – ‘The best point he’ll ever kick’

The only woman AFL commentator so far, Underwood called matches for Network Ten during its 10-year stint as a broadcaster of AFL matches. Round 17, 2009, saw Geelong face off against Hawthorn, culminating in a one-point victory to the Cats courtesy of a Jimmy Bartel behind. With fellow callers Malcolm Blight and Tim Lane chipping in, Underwood described Bartel’s shot after the siren as the “best… he’ll ever kick”.

kelli underwood

kelli underwood – geelong vs hawthorn

7. Sandy Roberts – ‘Billy, you are King of Geelong!’

Despite being regarded as the mortal version of Gary Ablett Snr, Geelong forward Billy Brownless was the one who got the Cats over the line against Footscray in the 1994 fourth qualifying final. Kicking after the final siren, Brownless was crowned by Roberts as “the Sleepy Hollow’s” monarch.